The pandemic and other things I worry about

Worrying isn’t such a great idea, but I do it any way. This is especially problematic for me since I am professing Christian. Christians are supposed to cast their burdens upon the Lord. Currently we’re in the middle of a pandemic. That’s not  something I expected to see in my lifetime. We aren’t really in control, are we? A half million people have died—most elderly and infirm. Many more expected to die.   Tensions are running high in  people because of the stress of Covid. Our militarized police force continues to act with racist actions toward black lives.  It’s probably the worst time in history for marches on the streets because many  marches feature our most vulnerable populations, but here we are. So lurking behind all of this is the global warming trend, and I think a world that has dived into a worldwide recession.

So what do we do? How can anyone process all of this? We just have our every day life stuff going on. I’m estranged from my older daughter.  She absolutely won’t speak to me. I am not even against her reasoning, I grew up in the world systemic racism and I also have attended ultra-conservative churches. These worldviews have shaped me and she has taken a break from me to sort out her own problems. I miss her so. It’s really an overwhelming lot to deal with. So how do I deal? I turn on all the lights. Cast your burden upon the Lord and he shall sustain me. He will never suffer the righteous to be moved. As for me and my house, I will serve the Lord. This is what we do. We refuse to be frozen in place. No matter how bruised and bloody we are from this world, we look beyond it.

I turn to memories of my mema. She always said better days are going to come. She always said we are more resilient than we think. I turn to my mom who has been gone for over 15 years, but I still hear her voice.  Be a thinking person. Don’t take anything at face value. Don’t suffer fools. Treat every single person like they got a mansion in heaven waiting for them. Your past can work against you or you can reshape it and let it work for you. And finally she always said look out at the flowers of the field, they do not work, but they are adorned more beautifully than the wealthiest king. Look at the birds. They don’t know where their next meal is coming from, but  they just keep on doing their thing. And they thrive. You should do your thing, I know that God is with you and will take care of you. He’s going to take care of all of this.

I can’t imagine that you’re not worrying some right now. For some people this drives creativity. For others it just kills it like roadkill. Whatever state you’re in, embrace it.  Learn the lessons that are coming to you. If you’re pouring out, let the water flow. If you’re taking it all in, save  it up for when it’s your turn to speak.

Art.

Quote.

Although the world is full of suffering, it is also full of the overcoming of it.

Helen Keller

Stranger in a Strange Land

Hi, folks.

Are you a stranger in a strange land? I wonder if anyone else feels this way. Do you remember elementary school? All the kids would want to get into fights. I mean all the time. I had a hard time navigating that world. It was exhausting. Accusations would continuously fly. You had to chose sides or you were one hundred percent excluded. There were multiple factions. Each one believed it was absolutely right and never wanted to hear the other side of the story. If you did listen to the other side of the story, you were unloyal to the cause.  You chose the invisible route. Everyone called you a weirdo.

I had a number of personal problems as a child. I suffered from panic attacks, but no one really knew what panic attacks were, so most kids called me a freak. Every day I spent at school I spent some time crying, maybe thirty minutes or an hour. Sometimes the whole day.  I had asthma but it was undiagnosed. Of course, my family had no health insurance, and to go to the doctor you basically had to have an extra elbow in your arm or a fever so high that was causing you to have hallucinations.

I also had a glitch in the brain software. Letters got tangled. Random words and letters went missing when I wrote. Sometimes extra words and letters would jump in.  I couldn't tie my shoelaces. I couldn't tell left from right. Still can’t.  Writing on a line. Impossible. Writing a numbered list. (Think spelling list.) No.  I'm still not "diagnosed."  My mom believed I had dyslexia and  have this glitch, folks. Please overlook any glitching in my poor blog.

From my perspective, life is very, very hard. Everyone is fighting terrible battles. The more a person acts like everything is okay —that they know the answers and stress they are right hundred percent right—upsets me.  I try to hold true to this idea. “Be kind to everyone that you know for  everyone is fighting a great battle.”  (Ian McClaren).

I hope to see more kindness this week. I plan to rejoice every time I see kindness. If you are a stranger in a strange land, know you are not alone.

Art to brighten your week.

A quote for your pocket.

Be kind to everyone that you know for  everyone is fighting a great battle.”  (Ian McClaren).